Foreword
If you're not familiar with any of this enough to know what I'm doing, then to have a grasp of what is being said, it is important to read the The Oistar Guide, and then visit The DKMU website
and download to read:
A-A-O-The-DKMU-Godforms-Liber-Sigillum-Excerpt.pdf (This one is especially important as it is what I refer to when I say (often) that I did the ritual according to what is written in Liber Sigilum.)
A-A-O-A-Brief-Examination-of-the-156-663-Current.pdf (This gives further information.)
Introduction
I remember having had worked with the Linking Sigil since 2009, back then I would draw it on paper money, hoping each transaction (transaction being energy) would empower the sigil. I would lurk on their groups, wherever they were, not too active ... just enough to stay up to date. I had always found the DKMU extremely creative and some of their writiers are prolific and no less than genuinely inspiring.
I watched the group's transmogrifications as Occult Forums closed down, DeathByLollipop closed down, their facebook group also closed down for a short while ... but only to reboot anew a renewed enthusiasm and an excellent new website -DKMU- and their important summary: "Oistar Guide."
I'd bought two of their books on lulu.com, "The Assault on Reality: A field manual for the strange psyche" and the now famed, "Liber Sigillum" - the latter of which came with an activation ritual that would turn the Liber Sigillum into an activated Talisman for use with future magical endeavour. This ritual I performed in December of 2012, as a marker of a new 'chapter' in my occult life. Included in the ritual was a rutilated smokey quartz crystal ball. Both the Liber and the Quartz have been used in all the Rituals for this operation.
Another point of interest might be that, in the past, I have worked intensively with the Spider Egeregore - Arachnoid Essence - every since the late 1990's and early 2000's; back then I had used the (now disbanded) "Direct Magic" community's techniques, though with time I refined my workings and relationship. This prolonged connection with "spiderness" has proven useful in the DKMU workings which also connect, via the LS web, to the Spider Egregore, hence a certain feeling of familiarity.
So, on Sept. 8, when this series of workings was announced, I quickly jumped in. Having had only worked with the Linking Sigil, I was eager to try and work with the Godforms themselves, and this was such an occasion, delivered to me on a silver platter. "Excellent. I'm in."
As a final note, I'm a little disapointed in not having invested in a digital camera, as this text would be greatly improved by images of my various altars et cetera.
September 12: Ellis
1- On that week I was visiting family some 175km away from where I live, and as I did not have access to my temple, my younger brother was kind enough to lend me his house for the afternoon.
2- The material that I did have for the altar, however, were as so: a ghost spider cast in epoxy, my Ritual Cup (which I have been magically using since 1998), a large clear quartz crystal ball for scrying, Liber Sigillum, and the aformentioned Rutilated Smokey Quartz. I also have a large musical triangle for use as ritual chime.
3- Around the altar I had arranged 8 red candles, each resting on a spider-themed paper plate (hooray for halloween sales!) and each paper plate had drawn a sigil or written something. The 8 candles made a circle / chaostar, while on the outside was my laptop with the Linking Sigil serving as an electronic Stele. The disposition was as so (though as circle and not as rectangle):
4- The ritual was perfomed as per the Liber Sigillum in the midst of the red candles. (At some point I made a promise to take a drink in honour of the Red Queen, as I did the ritual without sacrament, using an empty cup.) Then a long scrying (I lost track of time as to how long), then a 9 card tarot reading (8 for chaostar + 1 in the center), a short scrying (3-8mins), and a final short tarot reading (3 cards). The results are as follows:
First Scrying:
(I did the scrying sitting on the floor, cross-legged, with pen and paper beside me, on occasion the crystal was in my hands, on others on its stand; each list item represents what I see after a rotation of the crystal.)
First Divination, an 8 card reading: (All of the cards' bases were facing outwards.)(Incidentally, The Hermit is a card which I identify with very much.)
Second Scrying
Second Divination (I did not put the previous cards back in the deck):
5-Aftermath: After the ritual was done, my brain felt very excited and lively, my nerves were tingly, jumpy and shaky while everything in my vision had kind of a vibratory property to it. It was hard to stay concentrated and mindful (and I more or less understood how a person can get clumsy and smash their fingers after such a ritual). All in all, it was as if my own "centeral fire" had spread throughout the peripherals of my body. Also I was feeling very hungry. I had to use a lot of mental strength to take the car and drive back to my mother's place, where I was staying...
A few interesting after-events happened that evening. A spider was found in my room, which isn't antitypical as I've done a lot of work with spiders, yet the synchronicity is interesting. Later on in the evening I saw friends whom I hadn't seen in a long time ... and was given a small 4cl bottle of Italian Absinthe.
September 13: Black Queen
On this day another member of the DKMU had proposed a group of synchronized rituals to the Black Queen. I did no formal notetaking of this ritual, other than what I wrote on the facebook conversation:
My whiteboard has the proposed sigils (as best I can draw them), while my altar has a white candle marked with 13 X's, soon to be lit charcoal with benzoin and possibly black coppal, iron pyrite, rutilated smokey quartz; for drink : rum and/or absinthe. As for liturgy, I'll be reciting the poem posted on Aonie's blog + spontaneous whatever comes to mind. All this towards East, except for a glass skull at the north. Also wearing all black, with a pendant made of smokey quartz in shape of skull. Still feels like something is missing, though...
(Not mentioned is that I had also used the 13th card of the Tarot from a Jodorowski/Camoin Marseilles deck, the four aces, queen of spades and queen of clubs of a regular deck.)
Just remembered I had oil of abramelin. :3
All I took note of during scrying, is:
You have been down
You have been up
You are nowhere found
September 15: Doombringer / 663
1-Turns out Sept 15 is the day I turned 33 years old. I did it in the afternoon, right before I went out to party with friends.
2-The altar elements were minimal: Liber Sigillum, the Rutilated Smoky Quartz, a white candle in the center (the match broke trying to strike it), a clear quartz crystal ball for scrying, a Sacrament to be smoked using a wooden pipe, a Sacrament of Dragon Rider (which is a shooter of 5/8 Jaggermeister and 3/8 Green Dragon (which is 94% alcohol infused over a number of years with Sacrament to be smoked)), my Windlass Raptror sword (as representing weapon of war), the triangle as used for a chime. Now back home, I can now use my whiteboard to draw the DB/663 Sigil; also, my computer screen was used as a second Stele for the sigil.
3-I performed the ritual as per Liber Sigillum, taking the Dragon Rider Sacrament at the beginning and the smoked Sacrament at the end. Once ended, I went into a deep meditative trance. The images that came to mind all looked like the sigil of Trigag, I was overwhelmed by these and wondered why. Once I came out of the trance and was once again able to concentrate, I took the crystal ball and started scrying.
4-What happened then was astounding. The images in the ball were as lively as a TV set rapidly chaning channels, too rapidly to remember and note them all. There were some images of Trigag, there were many, many images of Astral Larvae (this is their name in the French tradition, I have yet to find a better name other than "astral inhabitants" in the English tradition), and finally, when things settled down, a large image of a Cat's face.
5-Seeing things had calmed down, I was "ushered" by some mysterious instinct to go lie down in my bed, where I was once again overwhelmed by visions; all I could remember at the time of writing my notes down was the making of an armour inside of my aura, I was dancing around myself, faster and faster to the point of an energetic whirlpool ... followed by a severe dissociation of my self / selves ... I was no longer able to identify with either self / nonself, yet at the same time all selves / nonselves felt profoundly as "me".
6-When I finally woke up, I didn't come back to my senses right away, I still had dissociation, a loss of my sense of self, I had lost my sense of being in the world, in this world. I also experience fear and paranoïa due to intense confusion and a difficulty to stay focussed. It was quite an adventure to get to the Irish Pub and order my first few drinks and even get back to myself enough to speak with friends. The last time I had been in such a state due to Magic, it had lasted for months. Thankfully, I got back to my normal state of consciousness while getting drunk with friends and had an awesome birthday party. It was, however, a lesson in humility: my sanity can be frail, I shouldn't take it for granted.
September 18: Ino
1-This was done on an afternoon before going to work. Once again, I used the suggested evocation in Liber Sigillum.
2-The altar setting included a white candle on white paper on which I had spread ash from incense and charcoal that was used in previous magical rituals (as the residue left when everything is gone), I included the Liber Sigilum and its corresponding Rutilated Smoky Quartz of course, added the Moon card from a Jodorowsky / Camoin Marseilles Tarot deck, five spherical quartz crystals (many of which I use for scrying), my phantom quartz point, another quartz point, and not forgetting to draw Ino's sigil on my whiteboard and display it on my computer.
3-The evocation of Ino (as per Liber Sigilum) felt like the most "blank" evocation I had ever done. Myself, I felt blank inside, empty. It felt liberating and peaceful.
4-The crystal scrying was ... blank ... except for two or three ghostly faces. I stared at it for a long time, but nothing except the vast emptiness of clear white quartz crystal.
5-All in all it was quite uneventful, yet it seems as if the result/event IS the blankness ... the silence of white. I felt extremely calm, a little sleepy even, and had a restful nap before going to work.
September 19: Thoth
Outside (yet strangely within) this marathon, I invoked Thoth with a friend. The results can be read in PDF format, - here -.
September 21: Equinox with the OTO
1-Indeed, I am a member of the OTO and on that day was their celebration of the Equinox with appropriate evocative ritual (of which I will say nothing). Afterwards, I stayed for a pot-luck meal and drink with them, and then went for another few drinks with those that remained, though never getting myself completely drunk, keeping some energy for the Trigag evocation...
September 21: Trigag
1-I did this one quite differently; late at night, sitting on the couch, cross-legged. Across the room, facing me was my computer screen with the Trigag sigil staring at me. A little to my right on a stool was a black candle. To my left, Liber Sigillum and the Rutilated Smoky Quartz, some writing material, and my Ritual Cup filled with water. Right next to me was the Chime, a triangle again. Oh, and for sacrament: Salvia Divinorum 5X.
2-I performed the ritual, again, as per Liber Sigilum. Though the first time didn't feel right, so I did it again. Then I smoked the Sacrament, using a butane lighter ... and it felt void and empty, useless. I still enjoy Salvia very much, but this time it didn't seem to want to go anywhere...
3-the days that followed are filled with what seems to be like a recap of all the negative feelings I've felt in my life: self-disgust, depression, suicide ideation, helplessness, demotivation, hopelessness, meaninglessness, anger, despair...
All things that I had thought I had gotten over with in past, less happy days. This process helped me come to accept that they are indeed part of my brain - at least as potential - and it all seemed / seems like utter bullshit mental masks that need to fall off. In my notes, trying to make sense of it all, I wrote:
It seemed to me that Triagag's goal is to make you go through every one of the worst emotions you've had in your life in alphabetical order and hurl them at you like a pie in the face!
Though in the end, they're just emotions - terrible ones - but only emotions nonetheless and in the end, we all end up six feet underground anyways ... so what then? I will Dance - sun rainstorm tornado with the sky on fire falling on my head, Dance! IO PAN Dance in Joy Dance in Suffering.
It seemed I had found, when all lights had gone out, a lighthouse in the center of my being. Which was a perfect introduction for the invocation that was to come next.
September 24: Zalty
1-I am surprised to see how very little notes I took, but then again, it is because I did not see or feel any results neither during nor after the ritual, except for a short scrying. I had myself a tuna sandwich for breakfast, and ate grapes following the ritual.
2-Altar description: used Saint James Rum, Liber Sigillum and its corresponding Rutilated Smoky Quartz, a scrying quartz, a compass, a white candle, my Ritual Cup, I did the ritual facing north instead of facing my white board, though my white board had Zalty's sigil drawn upon it, and finally a bowl of salt.
3-I performed the ritual as per Liber Sigillum, using my triangle as chime, though I added some salt to the rum before drinking half of it as sacrament.
4-The result of my scrying session was an inspired text based on vague imagery:
The light at the heart of chaos shines bright
Fair sailin for ye Even in troubled waters
Mind the birds. The blouds be passin
Land a hoy! Sail inta tha horizon Live ye well
Dance with the lady-pirates, they be angels.
Tis the rum that brings visions...
September 27: Red King
1-I was on a visit to see friends, some 200km away from home, and luckily, as they are occultists themselves, they lent me their living room for the evening to perform the ritual, while they were off to prepare a bar where they would be DJ'ing that night; I would join them later on.
2-They also lent me a piano bench as altar. The altar setting was done facing east, with: Liber Sigillum and Rutilated Smoky Quartz, six red candles arranged in a hexagram, two of my favorite amulets (of a baphomet within an inverted pentagram and a septagram encased in a circle), a scrying quartz, a Jodorowsky/Camoin Marseilles Tarot deck, a cup of infused Damiana for Sacrament; my computer was once again used as electronic Stele with the Red King's Sigil. I had also brought my triangle as Chime.
3-The ritual was done as per Liber Sigilum, with a scrying (done cross-legged on a comfortable chair with writing material, near the altar; afterwards a Tarot reading. During the ritual and afterwards, I had a sense of vacuity, as if in a dream...
4-The scrying only lasted until the candle at the tip of the hexagram went out on its own for no apparent reason, while all of the other five were still burning bright. Scrying results (each list item is a new image as I shifted the crystal ball):
5-Tarot Results. The method I used was one used in runic divinations, where you simply drop the Runes (or Tarot, in this case) and see whichever Runes come up and read from that. On the first try, the entire pack bounced off the chair cussion, flipped, but only the Knight of Disks came up. On the second try, the pack didn't do any thing. It bounced on the chair cussion, flipped 360 degrees and landed face down. Not a single card moved and the pack was as if I had gently placed it there. Then the computer went into sleep mode on its own. I did not dare do another trial.
September 30: White Queen
1-Interesting coincidence, Sept 30 is my mother's birthday, she turned 63. I called her in the morning, went to work in the evening, and came back to perform the ritual after that. The altar had already been arranged, and the sigil drawn on my whiteboard.
2-The altar was arranged as such: Use of the Hermit Tarot card (Jodorowski/Camoin Marseilles), Liber Sigillum, Rutilated Smoky Quartz, White Datura seeds, a white candle, white coppal incense on a candle-and-mesh burner, my two biggest clear quartz scrying balls, Optical Calcite, White Calcite. And the triangle for Chime. For a Sacrament, I used my Ritual Cup with Te Bheag gaelic whiskey, a bottle that has never been used outside of various ritualistic / magical context.
3-Liber Sigilum is no longer of much help, here, as there is not much info about the White Queen in it. The evocation used was spontaneous, the use of the chime when deemed appropriate, the drinking of the Sacrament when it felt right, and the incense when it seemed appropriate. This was followed by an inspired writing using my scrying crystal, and I used what I remembered from my spontaneous evocation in the inspired writing.
4-The inspired writing goes as follows:
October 3: Conjunctio
1-On Oct 5th, this is what I wrote on the DKMU FB group: I felt that I had almost no bearings for CJ0, so all I did was a meditation on the little information that I had. Perhaps I'll try again later tonight if I have time. Someone put up a sigil somewhere there, but the descriptions were still too vague. Even the Liber Sigilum states, "Though, to date, it has not been accomplished, and shall most likely never truly be - so marks the end of the Egregoric progression."
2-So, I guess my silence will be the best mark of what is described as "the hypothetical purity of the magician in his entirety; uniting the concepts of the connection, the initiation, the mystery, the dark night, the fulfillment, and the playing fields of probability at both ends into a singular quintessence." (Liber Sigillum)
October 6: Enu & Nul
1-And so it begins. I am writing this immediately after my ritual preparation and right before I start the ritual as is. Context: I had had a thoroughly bad day at work today, and a bad day in general. Coming home from work, I went to the groceries and to see a friend, starting to shake off the day I had. (Would this terrible day be a punishment for what happened with Conjunctio? I doubt it, but the synchronicity is funny.) Did my usual cleansing when coming home from work, i.e. washed my hands ate a snack and had a beer.
2-I have lit my temple lamp, on the witeboard, at the center, is a big sigil of Enu/Nul, on the bottom left, a sigil of Conjunctio (shouldn't forget hir twice, eh?), top right, the Linking Sigil (because hey, why not link back to everything else I've done in this current?), top left, a sigil of Lucifer (as the bringer of light had been discussed accordingly in the Enu/Nul FB discussion), bottom right, a sigil of Baphomet (due to its link with the drawing about Conjunctio in Liber Sigilum and the talisman on my altar.)
3-The altar is quite loaded: Tarot cards XIII and 3 of Discs, playing cards Ace of Spades (reversed) and 3 of Diamonds (corresponding to the Tarot cards). Liber Sigilum and the Rutilated Smokey Quartz, my two clearest and purest quartz crystal balls (which I may or may not use for scrying later, I'll be giving a rest to my two bigger scrying crystals) a toy mage which I had found in my previous appartement, my Ritual Cup filled with water, an Apple as sacrament, two shooters, which will be filled with vodka and jaggermeister to represent the twins, also as sacrament (I will drink the water and then mix the two in the ritual cup and drink the mix in one shot before eating the apple ... I shall see in the making), and finally the talisman I had spoken of earlier. It is a hand-crafted (by me) wooden talisman in which I pyrocarved a sigil of lucifer on one side and a sigil of baphomet on the other. Finally, my big candle-holder which I made a long time ago, containing the remaining of the black candle I had used for Trigag and a new white candle.
4-This whole ritual will be improvised from scratch. On my computer screen I will be putting an image posted in the DKMU FB group later on, which I incidentally sent by private message to the person who was with me when I crafted the aformentioned talisman. My intention is not to create a link but rather nullify or neutralize the existing one which could have an effect on the rite. Before doing any of this, I went in my room, performed a LBRP and after a Star Ruby so as to get me in a magical mood. I will now go back to re-read what has been written on the twins for inspiration, then give it a spontaneous go...
5-AND ARISING FROM UPON THE TWO IS BORN THE THIRD. I OFFICIALLY DECLARE THAT I EXIST. The ritual is done. Very short lasting it was. No scrying was needed. Intuitive gnosis was all I needed. It feels like a path was wired from me to ... something. My dreams, if I have any, should help me with that.
6-It feels like an alchemical wedding. The white and the black, the one and the zero, the infinite and the naught ... both are within me and I arise from their paradoxical union.
7-I feel, in a way, spiritually reborn.
8-Oct 8th, I feel a renewed energy, I feel magically charged. I feel ready to take on something big. I feel like I want to spread the magic, the wonder, the freedom, the love of the intensity of life. I want to stir something up. The DKMU motto definitively resonates with me much more than it did at the beginning, "Beauty. Variety. Conflict."
Concluding Remarks
1-A first, short analysis of this whole process would be that a grassroots chaos magic movement built up a high magic / initatic process which, although hermetically valid, is unlike everything I've seen so far in magical tradition. I am glad to have experienced it, and seen for myself - and felt for myself - what it is like. As I write this, I still feel its psychospiritual effects within me.
2-I just finished what appears to be the last magical evocation of the series. I admit that some of my evocations were better than others, but all fit in a, however crooked, well evolving process, giving the Mage a new connection to the Magical Essence. I feel inspired, to say the least, quite energized. I shall wait a day or three before coming to a final conclusion, if there is one.
3-On the 14th of Sept., when I was just beginning these evocations, I found a green lighter on my way to work. I thought to myself that I was carrying a green flame. Now, as this series of evocations is ending on Oct 8th, I have, on my way back home from work, found another green lighter. The green flame carries on.
4-Did this do anything to me in particular? On the one hand, I trust myself as mage and as person a little more, and I feel generaly more "fearless". I'm not sure if this is a good thing, though.
5-All in all, I do consider this "adventure" to have been initiatic in the truest sense, and definitively an occasion for growth. I feel ready to take on bigger and crazier things, and definitely have a sense of wanting to do more...